Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
