all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
whose parrot is this?
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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