at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
