i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
