I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
