If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize