No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
