Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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