your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
