he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
