come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
