K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Houston, we have a blender
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Everclear isn't food dammit
Randomize
