Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
