now i know why i became what i already was.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize
