please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
