question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
