I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Randomize
