I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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