He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize