I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
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