Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
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