Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
