Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Randomize
