Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
