new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
