I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
