she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
