There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
