Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
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