i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
third nipple confirmed
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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