So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
