the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
