scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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