North Korea, Best Korea!
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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