NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
Randomize
