I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
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