you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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