I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Randomize
