i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
