Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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