ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize
