you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Randomize
