We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Randomize
