Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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