Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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