OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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