What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Randomize
