Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
