WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Randomize
