Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
