I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Be still, my beating vagina.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
