Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Randomize
